If you’re single and over 40, chances are that well- meaning people around you are still showering you with dating advice. From “It’s never too late to spark romance” to “You better hurry, your clock is ticking”, it’s no surprise if you’re trying to absorb and at the same time decipher which advice should be taken to heart and which should be ignored.
Even if you’ve been involved in the dating scene before your forties, entering it once again could leave you feeling absolutely new to it as trends change and this includes dating trends. What’s acceptable and what’s not? How has the dating scene changed over the years?
To help you get started, here are some tips to follow and more importantly, mistakes to avoid if you’re dating after 40.
Mistake #1
LIVING IN THE PAST
The first task at hand when you’ve decided that you’re ready to mingle is to update your personal profile on your social media and/or any dating sites. Being honest and real is the best approach if you would like to get into the dating scene. You could start with updating your profile picture. First impressions do count and many tend to judge a person based on their profile picture. Though, before you start worrying about how your developing crow’s feet might show or if you start doubting yourself, do remember that your ultimate aim is to find someone who appreciates you and allows you to be yourself. There are a few tips to help you get the right image.
Firstly, instead of taking a picture of yourself on your couch with your front camera, we would suggest that you take it up a notch. All you’ll need to do is to strike a pose, get your friend to be behind the camera and take a few shots of you at your favourite café or corner at home.
Mistake #2
RUSHING TO JUMP BACK IN
Never allow the opinions of others to dictate when you are ready to date again. You may have the nagging voice of your aunt behind your head telling (or more like haunting) you to date again because you’re getting older. Though, if you’re not ready, especially if you’re recovering from a divorce or a rough relationship, it’s best to take your time before jumping back into the dating scene. Remember, the only person who would know when the right time is, is you. You will have your own set of priorities such as your career, family and other responsibilities that you may want to focus on first. Imagine if you were to rush in, you might end up feeling anxious, unprepared, nervous and this could ruin any dating opportunities that come your way.
Mistake #3
PLANNING AN ELABORATE FIRST DATE
Hooray! You’ve found yourself a date! It’s normal to feel a mix of excitement and nervousness especially if it has been awhile since you’ve been on a date. We’re sure you’re going to give it your all to impress your date but before you charter a private helicopter or book a string quartet, it’s best to hold your horses on your first date.
The Internet paints a fantasy about first dates and as seen in movies, an elaborate date is a guarantee that you’ll impress. However, in reality, not everyone may be a fan of an elaborate setting and plus, it could be a very stressful attempt for you if you prefer going for things sweet and simple.
A first date such as a dinner at your date’s favourite restaurant or over a cup of coffee might leave you with a better outcome than an elaborated one. How could this be? Ultimately, your focus on your first date is to get to know your date and discover the chemistry between the both of you, especially if you’ve never met face to face before.
Hence, imagine if you made elaborated plans, the main purpose and focus on this first date may shift as either one or both of you may be distracted by everything else around you.
Mistake #4
BEING OLD-FASHIONED
If you’ve binge watched the series Bridgerton, you’ve a glimpse of courtship and romance in the 18th century. Now, aren’t you glad that our modern society has changed for the better over the years? Especially when it comes to romance. Along with wearing suffocating corsets, attending countless balls and waiting for a man to propose after a dance, gone were the days where a woman would keep her interest a secret, drop subtle hints to a man and wait for him to make his first move.
Thankfully we now live in a modern era where both men and women have the right to make the first move in all areas of their lives including dating. So, if you’re ready to start dating again, don’t just hang around at home and hope for prince charming to ring your doorbell. Instead, start meeting up with your circle of friends and you could let them know that you’re ready to mingle as well.
Take your outreach into your own hands and challenge yourself to approach someone who has caught your attention.
We’ve heard amazing love stories about couples getting to know each other beyond forty and settling down together. There is no age limit to finding romance and it is definitely possible to start dating after your forties.
Scientifically Proven Ways To Make You More Attractive
#1 Smile more for females
A study by the University of British Columbia found that smiling women were found to be more attractive than other expressions. Though, this didn’t hold true for the men.
#2 Wear red!
The colour of passion, red has been proven to make you look more attractive based on a study published in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology.
#3 Have a sense of humour
A trait that both men and women find attractive in their significant other, you can’t go wrong with a good sense of humour for sure!
